Woodmania Blames Hurricane-Ravaged Area Players For NFFL Collapse

(Hebron, KY) - Last month, Woodmania was 5-1 and the jewel of the Nagel Fantasy Football League. This week, Woody Myers sits at home while eight of his colleagues are still alive in the postseason. He'll gripe to anyone who will listen about the last five weeks his team has played without a win. He's not afraid to point fingers at his players, former personnel consultants, and technical difficulties.

As if that weren't bad enough, he's blaming most of his woes on a pair of New Orleans Saints. Yes, the same team that represents the area hit so hard by Hurricane Katrina. Oh, and a man who grew up in the bayou.

"I'm not kicking a man while he's down. I'm kicking three of them." His first pick, and fifth overall, Deuce McCallister got off to a fine start (three straight double digit performances) before going down hurt. Joe Horn quickly disappeared after that. In fact, Myers traded Horn for some scrub back-up QB and never regretted the choice.

But the most bile is pointed directly at the pride of Breaux Bridge: Jake Delhomme. "Trust me, if I had my say, I would have stayed far, far away from that punk." This is in reference to the draft day complications that he still brings up as an excuse. "When the Deuce went down, so did Jake. In half the games, he didn't score more than a handful of points. He even cost me ten points one game! Negative points! How can I win games like that? I could have started Craig Krenzel and I wouldn't have lost. How sad is that?"

"I mean, look at these hosers that are in the playoffs. Bacon? Nagel? Pony boys! If I didn't have so many inferior people sabotaging me, I'd run all over them." This is the second straight year Myers has missed the playoffs.

The Sock Drawer and Unabated Sports contributed to this report.